My Enthusiasm

my enthusiasm comes in waves

like a pulsing tidal surge 

dragging down 

my inner shanty town,

filling my head

with dead tuna 

and blissfully unaware 

holiday makers

too busy sunbathing 

to realise the ‘big kahuna’

was coming to wash 

their debt-ridden arses away

whoosh!!!

 

my enthusiasm is stone cold 

instantly overnight 

when I feel I need a car jack 

to lift my bent spine 

off the couch, 

when my unenthusiastic self

finds that the further I walk

my face gets closer 

and closer to the ground

and my hearing fades,

and my eyes concave 

making me squint like a mole

trying to thread a needle in the dark

 

my enthusiasm really tanks

when I’m publicly flanked

by influencers and socialists

and pub singer vocalists

trying to sing ‘I Will Survive’  

in a way that makes me 

want to cut my throat,

when my enthusiasm’s high

I showboat, spectacularly

spitting peculiars that 

could tickle the toes 

of a psych ward full 

of clinically depressed 

psychiatrists who 

have done their best

to kill my enthusiasm 

by burying it alive  

in SSRIs,

currently I can’t feel 

love,

happiness,

sadness,

any type of emotion,

devotion,

laughter,

lust,

euphoria,

expectation,

agitation

and

adulation,

but my enthusiasm

is currently in great shape