Candy Assault

I got attacked by a KitKat wrapper

whilst waiting outside the vet

I was flummoxed,

I never learnt self-defence 

so I knocked it out 

with a packet of M&M’s 

I found in my pocket,

as I made my way to the car

an agitated Yorkie bar

flew across my bonnet 

I used a Twix 

to deck the prick,

hey ... check out all

these Mars bar packets

prancing all over the place,

they’re similar 

to the Catholic faith

they like to dominate 

and secretly rape 

mini-Snickers bars,

Dark Chocolate

Milk Chocolate

which do I prefer?

I guess we’ll never know

I just got murdered 

by a packet of Haribo