Communication 167

DAD ‘Dead Horse Bay’

 

It feels like years have passed since I’ve seen you

felt the warmth of your hand

smelt your tobacco laden threads 

it’s hard to believe you’ve been dead

9 months

where have gone?

are you young again?

free to breathe on your own

a veteran of a useless body

having simply shifted frequency 

can you still see me?

are you proud that I’ve continued to live

 

with your blood inside me

we’re bonded forever

in many ways we’re always together, 

but it’s not the same

it will never be the same

 

I hear you in my silence 

lost without your guidance

but I know you’re at peace

it was such a relief

you died at home in Mums arms

I understand it was too painful to stay

maybe I’ll see you again someday,

wandering the shores of dead horse bay 

Communication 166

 when I sleep 

 I have had dreams where I’ve fallen 

deeply in love with strangers

lucid worlds covered in ice, 

the sun reflecting off the seine

faceless passengers in a world I can’t define

a coma sleep blurs the lines between 

a world I love and a waking state I hate,

where do you go when I open my eyes?

do you remember me for who I really am

or am I forgotten forever

will we meet again in the strangest of places

or have the lines blurred so badly

severing the connection that fused 

us together in sleep 

Communication 165

the strangle switch 

engage the strangle switch

when an undefined temperament

is so hard to come by, 

there is no consistency,

I won’t except clarity

I’m somewhere in-between

I feel I’ve outstayed my welcome

a useless good for nothing fuck

who’s stuck in his shortcomings 

I’m not prepared to vegetate 

until I irritate the hell out of you

I won’t forget what you put me through,

a war without force, a decision without choice

a wound so deep left unstitched 

engage the strangle switch

before you turn septic